I visit Mr. Frump in the hospital
I see him most every day
And when I see Mr. Frump in his iron lung
This is what I hear him say
[deep breathing]
Y'know, Mr. Frump is my very best friend
He's never a chump or a tease
He never tells me lies, and best of all
He never disagrees
I bring him candy and flowers every afternoon
Sit down by his side and say