The trespassing signs and rocket designs
Keeping kids and cars away
A garage full of bikes, might as well be trikes
Your car is in a tent in the yard
Mowing at 8, you're the one we all hate
Revving motors and waking the kids
You live by yourself and refuse all help
You're the crankiest man on the block
Nobody cares about Albert Square
Nobody cares about Albert Square
Nobody cares about Albert Square
It's the tiniest of greens in town
You're always shouting "keep off my lawn!"
But you're really the greatest of the big yawns
With absolutely nothing interesting to say
We just really wish you'd go away
Nobody cares about Albert Square
Nobody cares about Albert Square
Nobody cares about Albert Square
Nobody cares about Albert Square
No one asks to wonder where
But you little square of lawn
Is your pride and your song
So read and tidy for all to see
We just want to say
That we feel this way because
Nobody cares about Albert Square
No one asks to wonder where
Nobody cares about Albert Square
It could be the best place around
