The blim holes in my shell suit
Joined into an absolute
And fell apart one day
They stitched me up in Everton
Then they took me to a surgeon
Lost on penalties
Mario man
Mario man
Mario man
Mario man
I married at the altar
The village idiots daughter
Oh, lucky me
We honeymooned in Cyprus
That's where she caught the virus
I flew home alone
So I bought myself a chip pan
And I sailed it to the Isle of Man
For a holiday
Struggling in a vortex
With my jacket made of Gore-tex
It fits wonderfully
Mario man
Mario man
Mario man
Mario man
Zap, zap
Wham, wham
Says the Mario man today
(He's played so hard, he's got blisters on his fingers)
Mario man
Mario man
Mario man
Mario man
