It's late in the year, that can only mean one thing
Holidays at the office are in full swing
Glitter everywhere, gonna end up on me
And when I get home my wife won't buy my story
Swear I'm telling the truth I've got too much to lose
Got those holiday office party blues

Better not single out just one holiday
Don't wanna offend on National Cat Day
Yet the same Christmas songs are played on a loop
And none of them by my favorite acapella group
Tryin' to tell you the truth
Need more songs for the Jews
Got those holiday office party blues

Hey, listen Karen
We don't wanna hear about your gluten sensitivity
And for the last time
Stop trying to sell your pyramid scheme

Just got the e-vite for the office celebration
Came with 30 pages of legal documentation
The dos and the don'ts, why it's now a cash bar
Last year someone decided to steal the boss's car
Tryin' to tell you the truth
We only come for free booze
Got those holiday office party blues