I got no time for a co-sign
I would just rather my credit be better
I got these bills that I can't get ahead of
Live my life alone or be dead as a debtor
I sweat and I shed a thousand tears and bled a river
Not to give a single fuck and live a life like I'm invincible
That wasn't smart
I'm paying for that, only in part
Still let the principle, hang in the balance
The price of my vices, my anger and violence I try to contain
Everyday it's a challenge
Use it as ammo and stay with my talents
Music to channel and starting a rage
Find a way deep in my heart and it stays
So I bleed it out, every bar on a page
Honestly, it's getting harder with age
My old records have a lot of things that I wouldn't say
In my current state
And I'm gonna pay
Truth is he's unwanted by most
Ruthlessly I'm being haunted by ghosts
If you could see dead people, honestly though
Would you eat karma or want to see hope?
Is this what it's like at the end of a rope?
Past and future suspended in both?
A place where your dreams end up bended and broke
Woke to this fear and resentment and both are continuing swinging
On this never-ending unhinging old pendulum, Woah
Can I still get my own engine to go
I know that every December is cold
This is the road. It took its toll
I fought it all from 11 years old
Seems like I finally come to a halt
I'm left with nothing and nowhere to go
I need the faith. I need the strength
I'm looking deep to somewhere in my soul
There's no escape
I gotta face what I gotta face
I question myself, am I up to the task?
The hatred of men
I'm pacing again, 'cause I've seen the snakes and I'm cutting the grass
I came too far to stay stuck in the past
It turned to nada, yeah, nothing can last
But I'm a survivor, and I'm coming back to scrap
'Til I kick the bucket at last
And that's what I have
That none could take
Some would break
I would not
I could just let myself
Get myself one more day
Today's the one, the day's begun
I have a shot
It's all that I got
I got a chance to raise my son (raise my son)
I've been redeemed in way more ways than one
I had some dreams and they've become
Really it's been an amazing run
So as I set this stage for one more time before my days are done
Walking this fateful course
I just want to say I'm grateful for it
Faith, support and the hatred toward it
Warriors fall down, but they push forward
Ever since I was nine
I'd pen some rhymes, and I would tape record it
My life has never been easy
It's been a beautiful struggle
I just never stop believing
And I try to do what I love to
Our lives will never be easy
They're always a beautiful struggle
I promise that you can get through it
As long as you do what you love to
