The girls are on the beach in their string bikinis
The guys are strutting proudly showing off their weenies
Top 40 garbage spewing expensive radios
As they primp their pampered bodies
And put schnozzguard on their nose
This ain't Hawaii
This ain't Hawaii
This ain't Hawaii
This ain't Hawaii
Prep school blonds and musclemen with perfect heinies
There's more money on this beach than all the tea in china
These girls all look like Nancy Drew, the boys like Jim McMahon
And their fat, white, ugly parents look like Morey Amsterdam
This ain't Hawaii
This ain't Hawaii
This ain't Hawaii
This ain't Hawaii
In droves they hit the beach in Porches and Ferrari's
The sun has cooked their brain they're on a surf safari
The Lake is full of creepy snobs, I stare to get annoyed
This isn't Honolulu, this is Illinois
They're surfing in Wilmette
