Story
We now return to "Celebrity Apprentehh"
Donald Trump Impression
Now Lil' Jon, why do you think your team lost?
Lil' Jon
WHO WHAT!!!!
Donald Trump Impression
You're supposed to be this great rapper
How'd you lose a rap battle with the deaf bitch?
CBS News
We interrupt your program for a special word from the President of America
Obama Impression
My fellow Americans
I have, uh, some shit to tell you
I know one president getting some anal from Michelle
Bitch, I got him
Saw bin Laden out in Pakistan, and shot him in the dome
And told him there you go
I got him, yo
We solved a fucking problem, Joe?
Let's break out the Hennessy
Everybody, smack a bitch around from here to Tennessee
Now let us see which Dirka Dirka wants another round with me
I thought I told you crackers, you don't wanna fuck around with me
Osama bin Laden
Ay, bro, recognize me?
I look like the Durrky selling you a Slurpee
So much noise about me
Everybody judge me
No one ever loves me
They say, that I'm dead
They don't even know I work at liquor store
They test my DNA
Science Man 1
This says, "Kareem Abdul Jabbar"
Science Man 2
Yeah, that's him!
Osama Impression
I drive a cab in New York
I did 9/11
I fight for Jihad
Al Quaeda give me discount card
Obama Impression
Bitch please, b-b-bitch please
Get off your fuckin' camel
Get your fuckin' sandals
Taking, we're t-t-taking
All your fuckin' countries
From you fuckin' monkeys
Osama Impression
Bro, I'm from Africa
I come from Baghdad
The Jews took my cologne
I smell like a dog
News Man Impression
Mr. President, who should we blow up next?
Obama Impression
Well, I know Prince William
He living like a king
He don't do shit
he just sit, and get shit for free
How the hell are you gonna let him pay his wedding with the money he took from you
Mother fucker, let him pay for it
What a bunch of pale, cross-bred, yeah, they all FAIL
One of them is dead, and the others should be all in jail
Oh, Prince Charles, living large, but your mom in charge
Fuck you, William, and tell the Queen to slob all on my knob!
Queen Impression
We're all living like kings
Raping all the peasants
Taking all their presents
So much nice things
We could have it all
We take it from the poor
Prince William
Hee-hee
Queen Impression
They say we're inbred
I gotta fuck me cousin, take a look at London
They mad, they want bread
But they can eat me ass poop
Prince William
AHAHAHAAHHAHAHAAAA!
Obama Impression
Bitch please, b-b-bitch please
Take off the fuckin' crown and
Blow your fuckin' man, bitch
Hey Queen, H-H-Hey Queen
Get off the fuckin' horse and
Make me a fuckin' sandwich
Osama Impression
Bro, fuck you William
and fuck your fat whore
Bitch, you can suck my balls
I fuck you by force
Donald Trump Impression
Hello my name is Donnie Trump
I make a billion every time I take a dump
I don't need to win the White House, I'll just buy it
I bought the Taliban and told Osama that he's fired
Now Imma smart guy, what the hell's this royal wedding?
I bought the palace and I'll move in when I'm fuckin' ready
So when you see the Prince of England stare and point and say
Ey, you got some free shit, bozo!
All Lawyer
You got some free shit
Donald Trump Saying
Got some free shit
Free shit
IT'S FREE SHIT!
Donald Trump Impression
Bitch please, b-b-bitch please
Get all your fuckin' boys and
Watch my fuckin' show, yeah
Taking, we're ta-a-aking
All your fuckin' oil
Yeah bitch, O'Doyle rules!
Osama Impression
Bro, I'm from Africa
Don't fuck with my bros
My crew's from Mexico
I blow myself up
Obama Impression
My fellow Americans
Today Osama bin Laden was found at a 7-Eleven in Pakistan, Ohio.
I greeted him there myself with a birthday card as I haven't seen him in over ten years.
I asked him to come to my daughter's birthday party.
He declined, so I shot him in the face....Myself!
We can all rest assured that Michelle will be giving me a blow job tonight...with her mouth this time.
Obama Impression
Am I really the first black man that has to convince people I killed somebody?
Michelle, what's that smell?
