I smile so they never know my pain
Tryna make a change and ain't even got change
Sunny outside, but I still see rain
But dead inside, I don't wanna remain
And my big brother Tay just fuckin' got booked (Booked)
And I can't even go and put money on his books (Books)
But I just had eight people pay me for a hook
Now I'm questioning myself and how the fuck do I look? (Fuck)
I feel like my exes left me for the wrong reasons
Left me for no explanations or they just cheated
And now they all got new niggas that they subtweeting
And that shit is hard to watch like two long seasons
So I sit in the car and I rap on these beats
But little do they know that this where I sleep
It's thirty degrees and my car ain't got heat
Ran out of food stamps, I don't know what to eat
It's fucked up I ain't got no dad I could call
My phone off, so I can't call no one at all
But as soon as I tell somebody my flaws
They turn to chefs and start throwin' that salt
That's why I cry alone so nobody can hear
The feeling that this on, I hope it disappear
Wishin' that I could be well-rounded like spears
'Cause the pain cut deep, man, that shit so severe
Look, sometimes I don't wanna live
And I don't know how to explain what the fuck it is (Fuck it is)
If I could explain it, I wouldn't explain it
'Cause y'all treat it like lotion and rub it in
You know the pressure buildin' up when you feel like givin' up (Givin' up)
And now I'm understandin' why my cousin used to cut (Used to cut)
I know this a subject I probably shouldn't touch
I just feel like if I die, wouldn't nobody give a fuck (Wouldn't nobody give a fuck)
Look, I'm sorry I'm not like y'all (Like y'all)
And I'm sorry I'm not strong enough to fight y'all (Fight y'all)
I know I might seem cool with the lights on
But got issues when they turn all the lights off
'Cause I'm tired of being depressed
Algebra problems, all I ever did was think of my ex (Ex)
She didn't claim me like I do with my set (Set)
She just claim that she was doin' the best (Best)
I cleaned up my act, she left my life a mess
Honestly, just tired of dealin' with stress
I'm tired of being depressed
I'm tired of dealin' with stress, yeah
