It's always been my fondest dream' 
I saw one in a magazine, 
And sent my order off six weeks ago 
Today a package came for me, 
From the Thompson company, 
The postman smile and winked 
and seemed to know. 
It was a Tommy-gun 
Model M1-45 
And as I opened it up, 
I was the happiest boy alive 
You know I'd have a lot more fun, 
if only I had a machine-gun 
You know I'd get alot more done, 
if only I had a machine-gun 
Whoa oh-oh-oh-oh! 
My own machine-gun 
Whoa oh-oh-oh-oh! 
My own machine-gun 
It's always been my fondest dream, 
A hundred round drum magazine, 
To write my name in lead 
upon the wall 
I'll open up my violin case, 
Point my heater at your face, 
I'll make you dance and 
have a fucking ball 
Just like Dillenger, 
And Bonnie & Clyde. 
Machine-gun etiquette's 
How they lived and died 
You know I'll have a lot more fun, 
now that I have a machine-gun 
You know I'll het a lot more done, 
now that I have a machine-gun 
Public enemy number one, 
now that I have a machine-gun 
In the dog day after-noon sun, 
now that I have a machine-gun 
Whoa oh-oh-oh-oh! 
My own machine-gun 
Whoa oh-oh-oh-oh!