Hey, one two, you still don't know me though Hey, hey Every page I pick a picture as my preference, but just for reference I like 'em all, number one through number twenty-seven One question, who directed the photos and chose the layout? How many accountants calculate the payout? How many? I need a scientific calculator I need a film camera with an adjustable aperature I want a three-piece stereo with a five-disc carousel That's sweeter than an apple dipped in peanuts and caramel One time I bought a bow and arrow Before I figured out that Michael Jackson was the scarecrow My sisters both used to have braids and hair bows The crib ain't never have no air flow We never had a day of central AC We always had a plate of rice and beans, I ate meat My mother lives in the same house we've been in since I was a baby I guess besides that year in Haiti Have you seen the catalogue? It got so many things, I wish I had 'em all And I would not feel sad at all If I could buy everything in the catalogue Yo, no returns, no exchanges Finger through the pages, no papercuts Self address stamped got me amped while the selection got me Waiting for the shipping times with less than prime handling Oversized dimensions, pay the extra for the weight and balance Standing on a porch light and the torch up for the postman twice rung At once too ho gung for the white van Every card scam ran through the works scan led up to this Every penny saved was a wish made for the brokest kids Paid my dues and paid a price on page twenty-three column B Double tape auto reverse and volume rotary, dial tone Don't bother calling me 'cause I ain't answering When cords ain't long enough to reach while signing for my packages Check the box for damage 'cause I need that mint condition in Soon enough the whole damn block is listenin' Until the next edition's in, I'm plotting my picks, planning my purchases Cop the whole damn catalogue of merch It's ill and worth the bill I thought I had it all, I thought I had it all One two, one two, a one two Cellular beeper phone receiver I'll tell you a secret, don't repeat it I need it, I didn't know I need it It looks like a pump and feels like a sneaker This crook smells like a skunk and steals like a tweaker We kiss a little longer, Big Red under the bleachers Got it made, got it made, like I was hot for the teacher It's a sound blaster car with the Altec Lansing speaker I like David Lee Roth and not the other guy It's '95 South, so I can learn to do the butterfly It's Triple F.A.T. Goose stocked even in the summer time My sweatshirt counting sheep with both words underlined Yeah, and Mrs. Fields to the cookie stop As quick as Mr. Owl licked the center of a Tootsie Pop He's top floor Hold on to the railing, watch for escalators zoom like its mode's set for scaling with adjustable contrast and sharpness I'm singing like a partridge Re-running the sale on shag carpet, hey It's a sliding scale for financial hardships, it's odd shit You want something broad, then go to Target