To no school proms I go 
I always bring my dates to the weekly horror picture show 
I lean over, try to kiss her lips 
She says no, go buy me some crisps 

Yeah, I am a monster movie fan 
In the back row of the theatre 
Sitting side by side 
Yeah, I am a horror picture freak 
She'll be mine, oh mine 
When they turn out the lights 

Dracula and Frankenstein appears on the screen 
Together with the meanest creatures you've ever seen 
Gently I put my hand in her lap 
She leaves me with a broken nose from a solid planted slap 

The same thing happens to me everytime 
Just trying to be nice to them, is that a crime 
Another date, another week, man oh man 
I just can't help it, I'm a monster movie fan