Oh, here I am again choking on somebody - else's dreams Oh, here I am again picking up the pieces that once were me So I empty the house I need the silence to start hearing myself out I talk to the ceiling bout my feelings, quoting all that Brene Brown Can't tell if what I want is what I want or what you want from me I want what I do I do I do I do I do I do I do to Have nothing to do with you Nothing to do with you I want what I do I do I do I do I do I do I do to Have nothing to do with you Nothing to do with you I've pulled the wool off of my eyes and now I can't unsee what I see It won't help either of us if I let you live your life thru me Cause you made all the choices that you want me to, oh Tell me how has that been working out for you? Is that working out for you? I want what I do I do I do I do I do I do I do to Have nothing to do with you Nothing to do with you I want what I do I do I do I do (I still love you) I do I do I do to Have nothing to do with you Nothing to do with you But it does And it will It's hard to admit that You affect me still All that I've done Still not enough Its like I'm still that anxious kid Who couldn't be who I was Skinny appetite Homecoming queen Class president But at night I'd be sneaking out Now I'm still running When I just want to be found You say your heart aches But how do you think that I feel? When I struggle to decipher what you want from what is real? What is real? What is real? What's mine? What's yours? What's real! I'll still love you But will you trust me If I'm never Get pregnant and married?