Hey! If any of you are looking for any last-minute gift ideas for me, I have one. I'd like Frank Shirley, my boss, right here tonight. I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane with all the other rich people, and I want him brought right here! With a big ribbon on his head! And I want to look him straight in the eye, and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey shit he is! Hallelujah! Holy shit! Where's the Tylenol? It's that time, Christmastime is here Everybody knows there's not a better time of year Hear that sleigh, Santa's on his way Hip-hop hooray for Christmas vacation Gotta ton of stuff to do to celebrate Now it's getting closer, I can't wait Gonna make this holiday as perfect as can be Just wait and see this Christmas vacation This old house, sure is looking good Got ourselves the finest snowman in the neighborhood Ain't it fun, always on the run That's how it's done on Christmas vacation Let's all deck the halls and light the lights Get a toasty fire burning bright Give Saint Nick the warmest welcome That he's ever had this Christmas vacation And when the nights are peaceful and serene We can cuddle up and do our Christmas dreaming Peace and joy and love are everywhere You can feel the magic in the air Let the spirit of the season carry us away Hip-hop hooray this Christmas vacation Fa la la la la and ho ho ho Jingle jangle jingle as we go Fa la la la la and ho ho ho Jingle jangle jingle as we go Did I trouble you miss I'm Clark W Grizz I am not wordy Little pervy Perky wife, nerdy kids, I plan out little trips Like my dear old daddy once did But fuck tradition, their bitchin' has got me Wishin' I snipped, we're not a modern family Not a bunch of munsters A daddy sadly driving, queen wagon family truckster An economic awesome maxi, if you're in your room relaxin' Playing Power Station on your walkman, way back in the backseat Been to so many locations that I can't decide the best I have so many addictions, mainly gambling and sex Hot ladies let the losers pass, but they see me and say Hot rod! Hotties got me eating piece of PB and J Whether you live in Coolidge, Kansas Or you own Caesar's Palace, family helps us manage When middle management's callous There's grief, struggle, trials and tribulations We'll fuck with the Chicago one, he's obviously on vacation Christmas vacation Christmas vacation Christmas vacation Christmas vacation Christmas vacation Christmas vacation We're so glad it's Christmas vacation