When I think of you Baton Rouge I think of a Mariachi band I think of sixteen and a crisp green football field I think of a girl I never had When I think of you Baton Rouge I think of a back seat in a car Windows are foggy and so are we as the police asked for our I.D. So helpless so helpless Ooohhh, ooohhh, so helpless ooohhh, so helpless Ooohhh, so helpless so helpless Well I once had a car lost it in a divorce the judge was a woman of course She said give her the car and the house and your taste or else I set the trial date So now when I think of you Baton Rouge and the deep southern belles with their touch I wonder where love ends and hate starts to blush in the fields in the swamps in the rush In the terra-cotta cobwebs of your mind when did you start seeing me as a spider spinning web Of malicious intent and you as poor, poor me at the fire at the joint, this disinterred and broken mount in the bedroom in the house where we were unmarried So helpless, so helpless so helpless So helpless, so helpless so helpless When was I the villain in your heart putting the brake on your start you slapped my face and cried and screamed that's what marriage came to mean The bitterest ending of a dream You wanted children and I did not was that what it was all about You might get a laugh when you hear me shout you might get a laugh when you hear me shout I wish I had So helpless, so helpless so helpless So helpless, so helpless so helpless Sometimes when I think of Baton Rouge I see us with two and a half strapping sons One and a half flushed daughters preparing to marry and two fat grandsons I can barely carry Daddy, uncle, family gathered there for grace a dog in a barbecue pit goes up in space The dream recedes in the morning with a bad aftertaste and I'm back in the big city worn from the race of the chase what a waste So thanks for the card the announcement of child and I must say you and Sam look great Your daughter's gleaming in that - - white wedding dress with pride sad to say I could never bring that to you that wide smile So I try not to think of Baton Rouge or of a, of a, of a Mariachi band Or of sixteen and a crisp green football field and the girl, and the girl I never had So helpless, so helpless so helpless So helpless, so helpless so helpless