There are those who manage such a charmed existence
Lucky ladies who've been fortunate since birth
All the major domos will know them
And obligingly will show them
Straight to the only table left on earth
These are people for whom life is not a challenge
They've got savior faire that oozes pedigree
They're the women men will die for
And millionaires will buy for
But I fear these ladies aren't me...

The cake life served me
Is upside down
The soup do jour I'm having spill
On my best gown
I get all wet
Each time I surf the net, yet
Baby, don't ask me why

It always rains on me
My one day off
And my blind date turned into
Boris Karloff
It's like a curse
I go from bad to worse but

Baby, don't ask me why
Funny...
Down at the IRS
I get the guy who never says...