She broke up with me,
two days later...
I think she met Don Juan in Italy,
she has a new man,
I have a new mustache.

Now all my friends are gonna call me mountain man,
and everyone will think that I'm a stupid drifter
to walk the earth alone,
I'll never shave again.

On the night she left me,
facial hair grew miraculously,
I dressed in black like Johnny Cash,
and grew this beard of shame.

I've heard it said she looks a lot like Sherilyn Fenn,
and some times i'm mistaken for Billy Gibbons,
look like a wise man, but I'm an idiot.

It's over,
she left me,
and she will soon forget me,
she found out I was lame,
I grew a beard of shame.

Come all ye faithful,
joyful and triumphant,
I am a new man,
I have a beard of shame.