Choked today on blank Tudor boldness as broken neighbours 
sucked through the seams of the shit they build with 
ostentatious walls.

Smoked today, fifth time since 1988, with kids I knew 
through springs, then again in falls, but they're not 
kids at all.

And then it came-our world in my chest-set up by your 
silent residue in my room, then in my car. 
But for today, too late. Some business I guessed. 
No cancellation, as if I knew how busy you are. 
To know a love like subtle brios, eclipsed crescendos, 
some swallowed whole.

Like things I have to look at: red hair and Rothkos, as 
if the angels just have to show.

In fairness to you I must revise this romance to rust, 
trade in this stash for cash, trade in these goods for 
ash. 

In fairness to you I will stare the paint right off this 
sill, beat down the floor with my feet 'till you and I 
have time to be still.