MICHAEL:
No more
Walking up six flights of stairs
Or throwing down the key
Because there is no buzzer.
No more
Walking thirteen blocks
With thirty pounds of laundry
In the f**kin' dead of winter
No more faulty wiring
No more painted floors
No more spitting out my Ultra Brite
On top of dirty dishes
In the one and only sink
Hello, to my walk in closets
Tidy as Park Avenue
Hello, my butcher block table
I could get used - I could get used
I could get used to you
No more
Climbing over sleeping people
Before you get out the door of your own building
MICHAEL AND JONATHAN:
No more
MICHAEL:
Noxious fumes from gas heaters that are illegal
JONATHAN:
Or will blow up while you are sleeping
MICHAEL AND JONATHAN:
Ohhhh!
MICHAEL:
No more
JONATHAN:
Leaky ceilings
MICHAEL:
No more
JONATHAN:
Holes in the floor
MICHAEL AND JUNATHAN:
No more
JONATHAN:
Taking a shower in the kitchen
While your roommate's eating breakfast
MICHAEL AND JONATHAN:
And you are getting water on his corn flakes
Hello, to shiny new parquet wood floors
As waxed as a wealthy girl's legs
Hello, dear Mister Dishwasher
MICHAEL:
I could get used
JONATHAN:
I could get used
MICHAEL:
I could get used to you
JONATHAN:
I could get used to you
MICHAEL AND JONATHAN:
I could get used to you
JONATHAN:
No more, exotic
MICHAEL:
No more, neurotic
MICHAEL AND JONATHAN:
No more anything
But pleasantly robotic
MICHAEL:
We are moving on up
JONATHAN:
We are moving on up
MICHAEL:
To the East Side
JONATHAN:
To the East Side
MICHAEL AND JONATHAN:
To a deluxe apartment
In the sky
JONATHAN:
What's that?
MICHAEL:
Oh, come on
Hold on, breathe
JONATHAN:
Uhhhh!
MICHAEL:
Easy
JONATHAN:
What are you doing?
MICHAEL:
It's him
Ah, hold the phone
MICHAEL AND JONATHAN:
Hello, to dear Mister Doorman
Who looks like Captain Kangaroo
Hello dear fellow, and how do you do?
JONATHAN:
I could get used
MICHAEL:
I could get used
JOHATHAN:
Even seduced
MICHAEL:
Even seduced
MICHAEL AND JONATHAN:
I could get used to you
Ooow!
Oh, yeah!
