Nasty Dan was the meanest man I ever knew 
He's stomp and scream and be real mean the whole day through 
He'd frown a bunch he ate nails for lunch and he'd never laugh 
He'd growl and yell and I hard tell that he never took a bath 

Nasty Dan was a nasty man 
Hard to understand that Nasty Dan 

Now Nasty Dan was a nasty man the whole day long 
He'd go where he could he'd try real good to make things go wrong 
He'd jump for joy when a little boy would trip and fall 
And the only words that he ever said were I don't like you at all 

Nasty Dan was a nasty man 
Hard to understand that Nasty Dan 

Now a real interesting thing that I want you to know about is this here 
Because it's the most important thing it concerns a girl and things like that 
Now Nasty Pearl was a nasty girl that met Dan somehow 
She said you like me rotten as can be let's get married now 

So they went and they did and had a nasty kid 
And I must confess that Dan pretty much leaves everyone alone now 
And he doesn't bother anybody anymore cause he just lives in his nasty ol' house 
With his nasty ol' wife and his nasty ol' kid in nasty happiness 

Nasty Dan was a nasty man 
Hard to understand that Nasty Dan