I'm only nineteen, I'm a little bit green I've yet to be corrupted by the frightful things I've seen With my measure pace and my bright young face I only want to make the world a safer place PC Honey to the rescue PC Honey's up the drainpipe PC Honey's on the zebra PC Honey's on patrol I've done the course and I've joined the Force I'm a brave upstanding Bobby full of keen resource Make me use my feet, keep me on the street So I know everybody up and down my beat PC Honey to the rescue PC Honey's up the drainpipe PC Honey's on the zebra PC Honey's on patrol Once we've lost contact with Mr. Plod Thus the trouble taketh root In the very streets they should have trod In his size eleven boots As you steal or poach, beware my soft approach With nothing but a truncheon and a talking brooch I'm a figure of fun who doesn't need a gun And you're going round the nick my son! PC Honey to the rescue PC Honey's up the drainpipe PC Honey's on the zebra PC Honey's on patrol