An old man turned ninety eight He won the lottery and died the next day It's a black fly in your Chardonnay It's a death row pardon two minutes too late Isn't it ironic? Don't you think? It's like rain on your wedding day It's a free ride when you've already paid It's the good advice that you just didn't take And who would've thought? It figures Mr. Play It Safe was afraid to fly He packed his suitcase and kissed his kids goodbye He waited his whole damn life to take that flight And as the plane crashed down he thought "Well, isn't this nice?" Isn't it ironic? Don't you think? It's like rain on your wedding day It's a free ride when you've already paid It's the good advice that you just didn't take And who would've thought? It figures Well, life has a funny way of sneaking up on you when you think Everything's ok and everything's going right And life has a funny way of helping you out when you think Everything's gone wrong and everything blows up in your face A traffic jam when you're already late A 'No smoking' sign on your cigarette break It's like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife It's meeting the man of my dreams and then meeting his beautiful wife And isn't it ironic? Don't you think? A little too ironic Yeah, I really do think It's like rain on your wedding day It's a free ride when you've already paid It's the good advice that you just didn't take And who would've thought? It figures