You buy me dinner when I'm in town
Talk about records that you know
Lay the friendship card upon me and out the door
Somebody said we hurt your feelings with our little 
dirty jokes
Then you accused us of stealing back our soul
Then you say that we're the assholes
Cause we bitched about the hassles
While you're sleeping in your castles
And we're still riding down the road
I hear you're all offended by the letters that I wrote
It's just a shame it hadn't ended long ago
Then you sicked your lawyers on me
Told them to go for the throat
And you just sat back and watched them have a go
Then you say that we're the assholes...
But I never would deny we have our share of the blame 
to absorb
But when you say that you're the reason for the things 
that we've achieved
I want to kick down your door
You like to say that we're the assholes
As if we somehow done you wrong
We just do what we have to, to carry on
I'm sure you'll find another asshole
To replace us for a song
You'll keep your office and expense account and we'll 
keep traveling along
When you say that we're all assholes
Guess it'd be useless to deny
I'm just saying you're the reason why