Don't get so distressed 
If the good life won't arrive 
You've been reading S.O.S. 
When it's just your clock reading 5:05 
And why are you so possessed 
By the thought that she got free 
And why are you figuring who's the best 
When just your luck ran out 
And she chose me 

We do not lie side by side 
And mock the thought of you 
And I don't take her hand and ask 
Is this what he used to do? 
'cause I just want to free her from 
Your jails of jealous dreams 
'cause at least a house when it's empty 
Stays clean 

I won't pretend 
That I was simply swayed 
It was a two way thing not a 
Three day fling 
No secrets kept, no truth betrayed 
And here's the house that held 
The nightmare that went on 
And you're sitting there wishing you'd never been born 
With that self-inflicted crown of thorns 

We do not lie side by side 
And mock the thought of you 
And I don't take her hand and ask 
Is this what he used to do? 
'cause I just want to free her from 
Your jails of jealous dreams 
'cause at least a house when it's empty 
Stays clean 

I won't pretend 
That I'm the savior of the innocent and bad 
But put two withered old blooms in a couple of rooms 
And they'll behave like lunatics 
And crave what makes them sad 

So here's a card that says 
Happy twenty-second birthday and I wish you were dead 
And here's a house that held 
A bevy of devils and an angel as well 
And you want what I've got 
When all I've got is guilt 
And a room that won't stay still 
Filled with pockets full of crumpled up money and 
A mantelpiece littered with bills 
'cause at least a house when it's empty 
Stays clean