I hope that the last page of your 800 page novel is missing
I hope that it rains if you leave the window down on your red Mustang

Cuz everyday ought to be a bad day for you
Everyday ought to be a bad day for you

If you drop your keys I hope there's a sewer somewhere very nearby
I hope that your team lost, I hope your new girl takes off with a new guy

Cuz everyday ought to be a bad day for you
Cuz everyday ought to be a bad day for you

And I would like to be your girlfriend so I could dump you
And I would like to be your garbage man so I would never have to pick up your trash again

Maybe you should wonder why your apartment is always so empty
I hope you get locked out of that apartment and have to call Jenny
Ohhhh!

Cuz everyday ought to be a bad day for you
Oh everyday ought to be a bad day for you
Everyday ought to be a bad day for you
Cuz everyday ought to be a bad day

But I'm sorry if it ever is
(Everyday ought to be a bad day for you)