It was a beautiful day in New York town Folks jogging, biking, walking 'round When a couple of airplanes came around Hit the big towers, knocked 'em down Worst disaster on US soil ever! 'Course, there's the Indians... a few million slaves... Enron... Anyway, it was worse than Pearl Harbor! President W. was flying around Far away from New York town When finally he came on TV, He said "Why do they hate us? -- 'cause we're free." Free to round up dark-skinned bearded guys... Free to detain anyone who might have ties to Osama... Al Qaida... Somewhere in Cleveland there's some guy named Al Kida -- K - I - D - A... He's freaking out! Congress quickly rang the bell And tried to fight those terrorist cells With laws designed to never let Our country fall to a terrorist threat Anyone who knows anyone who knows anyone who knows anyone who knows anyone who knows anyone who might be a terrorist -- is a terrorist! There's terrorists using your email name Sitting next to you at the ballgame Terrorists hiding in your bed Terrorists borrowing your head Never seen so many terrorists... I had to turn in my own Mom... you know what they say... unpaid parking tickets aids terrorists There's laws for this and laws for that To keep those terrorists under wraps Some folks disagree with these And talk of civil liberties But it's like the Attorney General says... If in times like these you can talk about individual freedom... you're probably a terrorist If you're planning air travel soon You might want to think about a weather balloon Nothing gets past those X-Ray Peekers And don't carry nothing in your sneakers Sorry for all the delays... if you want to get there so dang fast you oughta take the train... "I have never been so insulted"... "Shut up, Dale." Well India and Pakistan Are thinking of trading nuclear bombs Israel and the PLO -- Suicide's the way to go Meanwhile the lessons of 9-1-1 are clear... Let's blow up the Middle East... Smoking marijuana aids terrorists... Cuba's our enemy unless we need a prison camp... John Walker Lindh could be your kid unless we get an economic stimulus package... And let's get that guy in Cleveland - AL KIDA!