Well I'd never sleep with your ex-girlfriend
Even if she starts to flirt with me again.
Allow me apologize for my slightly wicked thoughts;
'Cause that's the kind of friend that you've got.
If a fight breaks out and you're the cause of it
In some redneck bar where you've been talking shit.
I would not forsake you later in that parking lot
'cause that's the kind of friend that you've got.
Well through the laughter and the tears,
we go stumbling through the years.
A bit dysfunctional well folks might say
Well I've got the dirt on you.
Hey, I've got plenty on you too.
So I pray we stay together all our days.
So when you're on a date
and you finally bring that girl home.
You put a little Captain Beefheart on the stereo
and you disconnect the phone.
Then I show up drunk and raving,
and then I pass out on the spot.
'Cause that's the kind of friend
That you've got.
Well through the laughter and the tears,
we go stumbling through the years.
A bit dysfunctional well folks might say
You can say that again.
Well I've got the dirt on you.
Hey, I've got plenty on you too;
So I pray we stay together all our days.
Oh dear lord
Yeah I pray we stay together all our days.
