They'll be flying in by charter With their wallets full of notes They'll be queues to stop at lands And then begin a ton of grotes And if we were a seaport Well I'd bet they'd come by boats And surely even royalty would stand For the biggest little mouthful in the land There'll be talk of it in Moscow They made copies in Japan And those gastronomic Germans Will be swarming through this land I suspect that even others Will admit we poms are grand And they'll cheer so loud They'll drown a passing jet For the biggest load of bull they'll ever get When they hear of us in Texas They'll call in the FBI Who'll appoint John Wayne official And then send him here to spy But the Duke will take one mouthful And he'll break right down and cry To think I thought ya limeys just ate spam Damn it you might yank the yanks Right here in Birmingham Boom boom