Hey bus driver, keep the change 
Bless your children, give them names 
Don't trust men who walk with canes 
Drink this and you'll grow wings on your feet 
Broadway Mary, Joan Fontaine 
Advertiser on a downtown train 
Christmas crier bustin' cane 
He's in love again 

Where dock worker's dreams mix with panther's schemes 
To someday own the rodeo 
Tainted women in VistaVision 
Perform for out-of-state kids at the late show 

Wizard imps and sweat sock pimps 
Interstellar mongrel nymphs 
Rex said that lady left him limp 
Love's like that (sure it is) 
Queen of diamonds, ace of spades 
Newly discovered lovers of the Everglades 
They take out a full-page ad in the trades 
To announce their arrival 
And Mary Lou, she found out how to cope 
She rides to heaven on a gyroscope 
The Daily News asks her for the dope 
She said, "Man, the dope's that there's still hope" 

Senorita, Spanish rose 
Wipes her eyes and blows her nose 
Uptown in Harlem she throws a rose 
To some lucky young matador