Dick meets Jane and a fire starts
Jane leaves Dick and it breaks his heart
Dick asked Jane, "Why'd you leave me?"
"Cause you're not dangerous, rough or sleazy"

Now Dick's dangerous
Now Dick's rough
Now Dick's sleazy
Nice guy Dick don't live here anymore
Dick bought a swanky love pad down by the shore
He's going prime time
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All the girls come around to get Dick
They all adore him now 'cause he acts like a prick
Each one tries to tie Dick down
Dick never falls in love, on the girls start coming 'round

Dick don't fall for their sweetness
He knows their weakness
Dick knows a secret
Secret is Dick leased himself a nice car
Girls like car
Girls like Dick
Dick scores
He's going prime time
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Suddenly Jane wants back in Dick's life
'cause Jane hears Dick's a popular guy
Jane looks good, Dick takes her home
Dick kicks hers out after he gets his bone
Now Jane wants him
Now Jane needs him
Now Jane loves him

Jane loves Dick now that she got the heave ho
Jane got what she wanted
Dick ain't a nice guy no more
He's going prime time
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