Uh-huh, honey. This video might be the worst thing in history. Even worse than when I asked Kim to marry me. Bound. Douchebags in love Bound. Douchebags in love Uh-huh, honey. Why am I inside a 90's screensaver? These backgrounds look like old Windows wallpaper I'm losing my brain This concept is trash Why the hell am I dressed up like a lumberjack? I know that I'm a narcissistic psycho Ignorant, going on rants at every show Even the president said I'm a jackass. It's a true fact The whole country knows that. I think I'm a lyrical genius, but why? Most of the lyrics in this song would make Pac cry. And how come Kim look like a wannabe J Lo? Only thing bigger than her ass is my ego. (Uh-huh, honey.) Uh I'm so childish If you critique me I'll fuckin lose it Throw a tantrum like a five year old kid And that's the reason why I am a gay fish. Kim K And Kanye Together Is damn sure To make the world throw up Please save us god (Uh-huh, honey.) This just turned into a gross sex tape You might as well call me the new Ray J But hey, that's how Kim got famous I mean damn, might as well show off her only true talent Yes, you named our Kimyaby Northwest And yes, it's because we're smug and mindless. (Uh-huh, honey.) But hey, who wouldn't want their first kid To be named after a direction? And I think that I am the black Jesus Why you think I named my new album Yeezus? Now it's my time to die for your sins Watch out god here comes Kanye bitch. (Uh-huh, honey.) Kanye Is dead now He's flying Through the clouds This is really messed up Heaven is fucked. (Uh-huh, honey.) And this year's Lifetime Achievement Award goes to... Nelson Mandela. Thank you so much! I've always dreamed what it would be like to win one of these. But I never actually thought it would happen. Thank you so very! Yo, Nelson. I'm really happy for you. I'm-a let you finish. That I just wanted to say, I should've won this award. If I lived in '95, I would've been the greatest person of all time. Of all time! Are you fucking kidding me?! I have no idea how he even got up here! What the?! Where the hell am I?! Well, well, well. If it isn't Kanye West! Taylor Swift?! You were the devil?! Ha ha ha ha ha ha HAA!! That's right! I've been waiting for this moment ever since the 2009 VMAs!! HAAA ha ha ha ha ha ha ha HAA! Oh, shit!