When I was thirteen
I'd started gaining weight
So I started counting calories sometimes
When I was sixteen
Someone told me I was stupid
So I bit my tongue, let others speak their mind
Now I hear voices late at night
And honestly I'm terrified
That I'm never gonna be the same
Some people are scared of heights
Or monsters coming out at night
But I'm afraid of something I can't change
I'm scared of myself
If you ask me the truth
I'm not doing well
I'm afraid for my life
I'm at war with my mind
And nobody can help
My thoughts go
(You're not good enough
Life's not fair
If you died
No-one would care)
Oh
I've lost control
I'm scared of myself
If you ask me the truth
I'm not doing well
I'm not doing well
When I was nineteen
Someone stole my innocence
And the first thing that I did was blame myself
Now in my twenties
And I still feel like a kid
Trying to work through all this shit but, god, it's heavy
Now I hear voices late at night
And honestly I'm terrified
That I'm never gonna be the same
Some people are scared of heights
Or monsters coming out at night
But I'm afraid of something I can't change
I'm scared of myself
If you ask me the truth
I'm not doing well
I'm afraid for my life
I'm at war with my mind
And nobody can help
My thoughts go
(You're not good enough
Life's not fair
If you died
No-one would care)
Oh
I've lost control
I'm scared of myself
If you ask me the truth
I'm not doing well
I'm not doing well
