Well Ali Baba had them forty thieves Scheherezad-ie had a thousand tales But master you in luck 'cause up your sleeves You got a brand of magic never fails You got some power in your corner now Some heavy ammunition in your camp You got some punch, pizazz, yahoo and how See all you gotta do is rub that lamp And I'll say Mister Aladdin, sir What will your pleasure be? Let me take your order Jot it down You ain't never had a friend like me No no no Life is your restaurant And I'm your maitre d' C'mon whisper what it is you want You ain't never had a friend like me Yes sir, we pride ourselves on service You're the boss The king, the shah Say what you wish It's yours! True dish How about a little more Baklava? Have some of column "A" Try all of column "B" I'm in the mood to help you dude You ain't never had a friend like me Can your friends do this? Do your friends do that? Do your friends pull this out their little hat? Can your friends go, poof? Well, looky here Can your friends go, Abracadabra, let 'er rip And then make the sucker disappear? So doncha sit there slack jawed, buggy eyed I'm here to answer all your midday prayers You got me bona fide, certified You got a genie for your charge d'affaires I got a powerful urge to help you out So what-cha wish? I really wanna know You got a list that's three miles long, no doubt Well, all you gotta do is rub like so - and oh Mister Aladdin, sir, have a wish or two or three I'm on the job, you big nabob You ain't never had a friend, never had a friend You ain't never had a friend, never had a friend You ain't never had a friend like me You ain't never had a friend like me, hah!