I hate you for making me something I wasn't meant to be and I hate I let you do that to me And I hate you for changing my mind when I made it up I hate that I gave up so easily Yeah, and holding on is weighing down on me I wanna be free I wanna be me again, baby I wanna go back in time to 19 Tell her everything I've seen and I wanna trust I wanna let go but it still hurts You know what you did I wanna forgive you but I Need to hate you first I love me for leaving, I'm proud that I did And I love that you can see how I'm doing now It's kind of validating hearing other people saying They watched you put my fire out but it's coming back around I wanna be free I wanna be me again, baby I wanna go back in time to 19 Tell her everything I've seen and And I wanna trust I wanna let go but it still hurts You know what you did I wanna forgive you but I I need to hate you first Mm-mm I pray one day I'll think about you and realize I don't think about you I had to feel it all to feel nothing Yeah, I pray one day I'll think about you and realize I don't think about you I had to feel it all to feel nothing I wanna be free I wanna be me again, baby Wanna go back in time to 19 Tell her everything I've seen and And I wanna trust I wanna let go but it still hurts You know what you did I wanna forgive you but I Need to hate you first Mm-mm Need to hate you first