It was your father who trained you and your mother who brained you To be so useless and shy But I just replaced them and tried not to break them Because you could stand up if you tried And I wanna see your face when your knees and your legs Are just gonna break down and die And, who's driving your plane? Who's driving your plane? Who's driving your plane? Who's driving your plane? Are you in control or is it driving you insane? If I could wave a magic wand, then maybe you'd change Back to bein' a blonde And your skirt would come down, it would cover your feet! If I said, "It's not camp to wear Tiffany lamps" You'd be thrown right out in the street And I wonder who's driving your plane? Who's driving your plane? Who's driving your plane? Who's driving your plane? Are you in control or is it driving you insane? You could stand on your head or maybe sing in bed If I said it was the thing to do If you're in with the faces and their getaway places 'Cause they don't take no notice of you Well, the trendy pace-setters will just called you a pain 'Cause I want to know, who's driving your plane