Sitting on this barstool talking like a damn fool Got the twelve o'clock news blues And I've given up hope on the afternoon soaps And a bottle of cold brew Is it any wonder I'm not crazy? Is it any wonder I'm sane at all Well I'm so tired of losing- I got nothing to do and all day to do it I go out cruisin' but I've no place to go and all night to get there Is it any wonder I'm not a criminal? Is it any wonder I'm not in jail? Is it any wonder I've got Too much time on my hands, it's ticking away with my sanity I've got too much time on my hands, it's hard to believe such a calamity I've got too much time on my hands and it's ticking away from me Too much time on my hands, too much time on my hands Too much time on my hands Well, I'm a jet fuel genius - I can solve the world's problems Without even trying I have dozens of friends and the fun never ends That is, as long as I'm buying Is it any wonder I'm not the president (He's not the president) Is it any wonder I'm null and void? Is it any wonder I've got Too much time on my hands, it's ticking away at my sanity I've got too much time on my hands, it's hard to believe such a calamity I've got too much time on my hands and it's ticking away from me Too much time on my hands, too much time on my hands Too much time on my hands