Are you sitting comfortably? Good! Then we'll begin... (spoken) There was a crooked man And he walked a crooked mile He had a crooked stick And oh boy how it cramped his stily Well did ya mamma ever tell ya Them kookie little nurs 'ry rhymes Jack and Jill went up the hill Supposed to get some water They stayed up there a long time Doing what they shouldn't ought-a Did ya mamma ever tell ya Them funky little nurs' ry rhymes. And when you got a little older Did you learn to read between the lines What did ya mamma ever tell ya 'bout the A's and B's and C's Did she ever tell ya 'bout the birds and the bees. S'ay mamma ever tell ya You were brought by the stork And how you could run before you could walk? Mary had a little lamb, his feet we're black as coal He even followed her to bed The naughty little soul did ya Mamma ever tell ya Them kookie little nurs'ry rhymes Little Jackie Horner sitting quite in his corner How'd he get that name Doing what he shouldn't ought-a How about that oldie lady who was living in a shoe She had so many children She knew how and what to do - oh How you could run, how you could run, How you could run before you could walk yeah !