Some said the local lake had been enchanted Others said it must have been the weather The neighbors were trying to keep it quiet But I swear that I could hear the laughter So they jokingly nicknamed it 'The Porridge' 'cause overnight that lake had turned as thick as butter But the local kids would still go swimming, drinking Saying that to them it doesn't matter If you just hold in your breath Till you come back up in full Hold in your breath 'till you thought it through, you fool The genius next door was busing table Wiping clean the ketchup botle labels Getting high and muttering German fables Didn't care as long as he was able To strip his clothes off by the dumpster At night while everyone was sleeping And wade midway into that porridge Just him and his secret he was keeping If you just hold in your breath Till you come back up in full Hold in your breath 'till you thought it through, you foolish child In the morning the film crews start arriving With donuts, coffee and reporters The kids are waking up hung over The neighbors were starting up their cars The garbage men were emptying the dumpsters Atheists were praying full of sarcasm And the genius next door was sleeping Dreaming that the antidote is orgasm If you just hold in your breath Till you come back up in full Hold in your breath 'till you thought it through, you fool