Good evening
Do not attempt to adjust your radio, there is nothing wrong
We have taken control as to bring you this special show
We will return it to you as soon as you are grooving
    
Welcome to station WEFUNK, better known as We-Funk
Or deeper still, the Mothership Connection
Home of the extraterrestrial brothers
Dealers of funky music
P-Funk, uncut funk, The Bomb
    
Coming to you directly from the Mothership
Top of the Chocolate Milky Way, 500,000 kilowatts of P-Funk-power
So kick back, dig, while we do it to you in your eardrums
And me? I'm known as Lollipop Man, alias the Long-Haired Sucker
My motto is
    
Make my funk the P-Funk
I want my funk uncut (make mine the P)
Make my funk the P-Funk
I wants to get funked up (wants to get funked up)
I want the bomb
I want the P-Funk (yeah)
I want my funk uncut (make mine the P)
Make my funk the P-Funk
I wants to get funked up
    
WEFUNK, y'all
Now this is what I want you all to do
If you got faults, defects or shortcomings
You know, like arthritis, rheumatism or migraines
Whatever part of your body it is
I want you to lay it on your radio, let the vibes flow through
Funk not only moves, it can re-move, dig?
The desired effect is what you get
When you improve your Interplanetary Funksmanship
Sir Lollipop Man! Chocolate coated, freaky and and habit forming
Doin' it to you in 3-D
So groovy that I dig me
Once upon a time called Now
Somebody say, "Is there funk after death?"
I say, "Is Seven Up?"
Yeah, P-Funk
    
Make my funk the P-Funk (uncut funk!)
I want my funk uncut (P-Funk!)
Make my funk the P-Funk (uncut)
I wants to get funked up
I want the bomb
I want the P-Funk
I want my funk uncut (make mine the P)
Make my funk the P-Funk
I wants to get funked up
    
Make my funk the P-Funk (make mine)
I want my funk uncut (the P)
Make my funk the P-Funk (hah!)
I wants to get funked up (WEFUNK, y'all)
I want the bomb, (home of the bomb)
I want the P-Funk
I want my funk stepped on (don't step on my funk)
Make my funk the P-Funk
Before I take it home
    
Yeah, I dig
Let me put my sunglasses on
That's the law around here, you got to wear your sunglasses
So you can feel cool
Gangster lean
Y'all should dig my sun-rooftop
Well, all right. Hey I was diggin' on y'alls funk for awhile
Sounds like it got a three on it though, to me
Then I was down south and I heard some funk with some main ingredients
Like Doobie Brothers, Blue Magic, David Bowie
It was cool
But can you imagine Doobiein' your funk? Ho
WEFUNK, we funk
Make my funk the P-Funk (ho!)
I want my funk uncut (oh, make mine)
Make my funk the P-Funk (yeah)
I wants to get funked up
I want the bomb
I want the P-Funk (P-Funk, y'all)
Don't want my funk stepped on
Make my funk the P-Funk
(Home of the extraterrestrial brothers)
Before I take it home
    
Gettin' deep
Once upon a time called Right Now
Ain't it funky now
Far 'round
Hey, doin' it to ya in the earhole
    
Make my funk the P-Funk
I want my funk uncut (make mine the P)
Make my funk the P-Funk
I wants to get funked up (I want the bomb)
I want the bomb
I want the P-Funk
Don't want my funk stepped on
Make my funk the P-Funk
Before I take it home
Yeah
    
We're not leavin' y'all, I want you all to stay tuned for Starchild
Make my funk the P-Funk
I want my funk uncut
Make my funk the P-Funk
I wants to get funked up
I want the bomb
I want the P-Funk
Don't want my funk stepped on (oh, make mine)
Make my funk the P-Funk (I wants to get funked up)
Before I take it home
    
Don't stop, get down
Talk
Blow your horn
Peee-youuu
Wants to get funked up
Well, all right
    
Make my funk the P-Funk
I want my funk uncut
Make my funk the P-Funk
I wants to get funked up
I want the bomb, (P-Funk)
I want the P-Funk
I want my funk uncut
Make my funk the P-Funk
I wants to get funked up
    
Make my funk the P-Funk
I want my funk uncut
Make my funk the P-Funk
I wants to get funked up
I want the bomb
I want the P-Funk
I want my funk uncut
Make my funk the P-Funk
Before I take it home
    
Welcome to station WEFUNK, better known as We-Funk
Or deeper still, the Mothership Connection
Home of the extraterrestrial brothers
Dealers of funky music
P-Funk, uncut funk, The Bomb
    
Lollipop Man here, alias the Long-Haired Sucker
Chocolate coated, freaky and habit-forming
Coming to you in 3-D
So groovy that I dig me
Yeah!
Yeah! P-Funk!