Is your pony close to you right now?
Perhaps your pony is just next door
Not more then a simple text message away
Maybe it's that special time
That you can bring your pony out
Take him around the yard
Walk your pony around a little bit
Ponies are naturally very naughty
They naturally want to run free
But not every pony gets to run free
In fact most ponies need leashes
Leashes on their goddamn faces
Cause if they get out and do run free
Ponies are very likely
To return to their original human form
You see if a pony is able to eat precisely
One third of their body weight in raw carob
Followed by three green apples
During the first half of the diurnal century
They will immediately return to their original human form
And we can't have that
It's a lesser known fact
That every pony was once a human being
This fact regarding the reincarnation of ponies
As punishment for their naughty past life behavior
Is widely accepted within the global equine occult community
So if you're still listening and I'm sure you are
Please donate to The Pony Reincarnation Foundation
We work with ponies doing past life regression therapy
So they won't have to continue to come back as ponies
Over and over and over again
You can donate simply by listening
And sharing this next hit single
"Pony Lonely"
Recorded by Rocco and the Love Apples
In a past pony life