The kids are at your mother's place the house is finally ours,
There's bugger all on telly, and we're just sittin' around,
And you look alright in the light tonight and I'm down to socks and 
skids,
You're a walk up start for a fuck tonight so go and put your teeth in.

'Cause darlin' I'm so horny I could die,
I'd fuck a chicken on a chain tonight just to see the feathers fly,
I'll drown in backed up bodily fluids if I don't get a fuck tonight,
'Cause darlin' I'm so horny I could die.

So you slip out'a your canvas nighty I'll kick off me skids,
You just can't beat a good ol' fashioned to help you get a good 
night's sleep,
So grab the jar'a vaseline and drag your ass across the room,
Prepare to make thy baby maker prepare to make thy do.

'Cause darlin' I'm so horny I could die,
I'd fuck a chicken on a chain tonight just to see the feathers fly,
I'll drown in bodily fluids if I don't get a fuck tonight,
'Cause darlin' I'm so horny I could die.

So clear the table Mabel, let me grab a hold'a them tits,
One two three four foreplay's over now let's get down to business,
I got hard-on here that a cat couldn't scratch so you'd better get the 
bugger to ice,
Been a bit'a back pressure buildin' up so darlin' hang on tight.

Darlin' I'm so horny I could die, 
I'd fuck a chicken on a chain tonight just to see the feathers fly,
I'll drown in backed up bodily fluids if I don't get a fuck tonight,
'Cause darlin' I'm so horny I could die.

Aw darlin' I'm so horny I could die, 
I'd fuck a chicken on a chain tonight just to see the feathers fly,
I'll drown in backed up bodily fluids if I don't get a fuck tonight,
'Cause darlin' I'm so horny I could die.

Aw darlin' I'm so horny I could die.

Aw darlin' I'm so horny I could die.