Went to the Met, I had the day off
I wanted culture, didn't want to flake off
I went upstairs to room 207
That's when I saw that little bit of heaven
She was standing there next to the Lautrec
My knees grew weak, my heart was a wreck
I moved closer, I could read her badge, it said
"Art Guard, my name is Madge"
Art Guard, she stole my heart
Art Guard, she had me from the start
Art Guard, doing her part
Art Guard, she was guarding the art
I asked if she'd go for coffee sometime
She said, "I'm here each day from two o'clock to nine"
I couldn't hide it, I wanted her that much
She said, "You can look, but you just can't touch"
Art Guard, she stole my heart
Art Guard, she had me from the start
Art Guard, doing her part
Art Guard, she was guarding the art
I said, "I like the Cubists, but I'm more into Dada"
She said, "Try the Pointillists, you really oughta"
"But where's Monet, Degas, Gauguin?"
She said, "Meet me upstairs in room 410"
She was a
Art Guard, she stole my heart
Art Guard, she had me from the start
Art Guard, just doing her part
Art Guard, she was guarding the art
She flew to Paris, went back to school
Worked at Musée d'Orsay, and well, that was cool
She found her passion, well, that's a fact
That little masterpiece, she's not coming back
She's still a
Art Guard, she broke my heart
Art Guard, she tore my life apart
Art Guard, I still see her in my dreams
Art Guard, that little masterpiece
