One, two, three, four
Slap
Fleet Street fell in love
But the girl proved hard to get
Took a seat at the old boy's club
But wouldn't share the bed
Cuppas for the troops
Bubbly-gum and wire
Trojan horses, Black & Tans
They're running for their lives
Royals came to call

Mister Paisley save her soul
Heavens here's the naughty girl
Wouldn't say her prayers
Bloody Monday morning
The rat who did the talking
Here's Ginger to the rescue
Take that! And that!
Take that! And that!