I woke up yesterday morning Fell down two flights of stairs Well I thought I was wide awake but my legs were still asleep. Nine-one-one ambulance help me But I can't reach the phone So I scream to the neighbors "come over break into my home" I broke my back There was nobody there to help me Broke my back All the lies and deception won't change the perception that I fell flat on my ass I wish this had happened skydiving That my parachute failed But a pair of shoes tripped me down stairs and I lay there and wail Those things I used to take for granted Now I take sitting down I can't brush my teeth, chew my nails, give the finger to a clown I broke my back And I can't even change the channels Broke my back I fell flat on my ass Well they tell me that I shouldn't get discouraged But they tell me that I'll never walk again And they say I'm gonna need a lot of courage And they say I'm gonna need a lot of friends But what I really need is a pair of electric legs. So I wish some genius would just invent them. And if they cost to much I'd share with someone else. Or I would scour the yellow pages and I'd rent them. I know I can probably pop a wheely Entertaining the kids I can put hockey cards in the spokes I can even throw skids I get a good seat at a concert Even get stuff for free Is it cause I'm an excellent guy or cause they're scared of me I broke my back And I can't even use the clapper I broke my back All the lies and deception won't change the perception that I fell flat on my ass