She turns up on the quiet at my surgery Stacking up on opioids and she never pays the fee She has a habit that would kill a horse stone dead She fixes up right there in my room Gets so high I have to scrape her off the roof She starts to dribble starts babbling too She's the Queen of England what can I do She says if I say I word I won't live too long Like that kid Diana so I do what I'm told Sometimes she tells me things no one should know I gotta keep writing keep her turned on Nothing I can do until maybe she OD's And dies Tranquilize yourself Britannia Tranquilize yourself Britannia Tranquilize yourself Britannia Tranquilize yourself Britannia So I got Big Phil coming down today And he wants medicating too Most of the time he comes over Cos he's got nothing to do Amphetamines are his thing right in the mainline One minute quiet the next verbose On and on he goes just talking shit But he wants to hang out and be my friend And I gotta sit there listening until maybe He has a heart attack and dies Tranquilize yourself Britannia Tranquilize yourself Britannia Tranquilize yourself Britannia Tranquilize yourself Britannia The doctor smiles like Jeremy Kyle Says hello madam take a seat I got 5 minutes to diagnose you Convince you I can get you healed Take one in the morning two in the evening Your situation it ain't unique If your condition don't improve Then maybe we'll move you to a higher dose next week Blaze, blaze away the pain From empire to opium From cradle to the grave Blaze, blaze away the pain From opium to empire Forever we are slaves Your boys missing school he's been labelled a fool he got ADHD Well a Ritalin script just might help him fit Back into the community If ends upside doing his time High on spice and rolling his eyes Well keep him alive with some Vicodin Tranquilize yourself Britannia Welcome to the pharmacy And the doctor to the queen Tranquilize yourself Britannia Welcome to the pharmacy And the doctor to the queen