Welcome my son to your very first day So proud to be the one Who brought you this way I love you with all my heart And my love is here to stay But I can't help worrying Will you eventually smoke weed? Soon enough you'll be walking You and me hand in hand The silly words you'll be talkin' Only daddy can understand We'll go out making snowmen Building castles in the sand And all the time I'm thinking, Will this kid end up smokin' weed? But time keeps on going And you keep on growin' You're now six years old You're getting so good at your spellin' But my mind is always dwellin' On the fact that you Could be the kind of guy Who grows up and needs To smoke weed on the couch All the time All the time So answer me this while You're lying in your little bed Why must you insist on bein' Such a fuckin' pothead? There's other things in life That can make you feel good But you just keep on smokin' your herb You can't get enough of Your precious, precious reefer Where you getting all this money To buy so much Hawaiian dope?