Performed by adam sandler, frank, and randi Transcribed by a fan "and now a cow at bat in the bottom of the 6th inning of a little league game getting hit by a pitch" [baseball sounds and cow bell ringing,ball is hit and hits cow] Cow: moo "and now a cow who goes skydiving for the very first time, and thinks his parachute isn't gonna open when it finnally does 40 feet from the ground" [plane sounds] M1: alright cow, don't even think about just jump and enjoy the ride down, quit being a pansy and do it Cow: moo [ripcord sounds] Cow: moo,mrr [parachute opens] Cow: moow [thud] "and now a cow who goes to the chicken hot drivethru and then gets halfway home before realising they forgot his french fries" [cow opening paper bag] Cow: moo,moo [car screeches, and turns back around] Cow: mrr "and now a cow winning first prise in the bellyflop contest at spring break and then realises he can't swim" [cow walking towards pool, big splash] Cow: moo [crowd cheering] Cow: mrr,mrr [underwater moo] "and now a club gets a dance at a classy strip club, when a bouncer notices he doesn't have any shoes on" F1: ohh baby you like it when I dance with you Cow: moo F1: uh uh uh, you can't touch that Cow: moo Bouncer: keep your hands off the girl Cow: moo Bouncer: hey cow, you got no shoes on you gotta leave Cow: moo M2: hey watch it cow "and now a cow playing tennis against farmer stinky thumbs arbuckle when the farmer makes an obvious bad call" [tennis ball being hit] Farmer: that was out Cow: moo Farmer: don't tell me it wasn't cause I saw it and that was out Cow: moo Farmer: by at least 3 feet that's how far, come in look there is still a mark where it's out Cow: moo Farmer: don't tell that was from an old ball, that was this ball and this ball was out Cow: mrr Farmer: you cannot see from that angle Cow: moo "and now a cow receives a phone call who he thinks is from a famous actor but he soon finds out it's just a practical joke" [phone rings, cow picks it up] Farmer: hello may I speak to the cow Cow: moo Farmer: hi, I'm a famous actor Cow: moo Farmer: oh, thank you very much, I was wondering if you would like to go to dinner with me Cow: moo Farmer: why don't I make reservations? Cow: moo Farmer: and why don't I tell you my real name? farmer stinky thumbs arbuckle Cow: mrr Farmer: take that fatty Cow: mrr [slams down phone] "and now a cow gets his revenge on farmer stinky thumbs arbuckle" [car sounds] Farmer: pull over, pull the vehicle to the side of the road, I am warning you for the last time. [car hits farmer] Farmer: oooh Cow: mooooooooooooo