I wrote this song late last night about my brother and all his might And you would be so very kind to listen to these words I've written About the boy who seems quite smitten, but like no other you will find 'Cause, baby, I know the reasons why we were unkind He's Laurel, he's Hardy, he's the life of the party And he's got great taste in furniture Wakes up at noon, plays the piano till he swoons, goes out for food 'Cause, baby, I know the reasons why we were unkind But I gotta know why Three years before me, you came out and cried Boy, not a girl, where'd you get all that pride? You are so very thin and I've always wanted to fit into your pants Photogenic at first glance, but got something missing for romance We share a mother, we do and a daddy too Home on [unverified] avenue and a melancholy mood With a rhapsody in blue 'Cause, baby, I know the reasons why we were unkind First born son, son of a gun I love you even more than when the song was begun First born son, son of a gun I love you even more than when the song was begun