What's the date today
Is it gonna rain
Can I leave here now before the show

Who's that other band
Just another one night stand
They can't sing and play as well as us

Just a week ago we were in Texas
Tomorrow night we play the Albert Hall
I'm sorry there's no time to talk to you right now
We're the biggest, the loudest, hairiest group of all

We cut a record once
it sold a lot in France
Now we're getting tired of the game
In and out of towns
satisfying crowds
Pillheads and the rest who come to hear

But things were fine when we made the money roll
Living off the fat of every land
Slept with girls who couldn't read or write too well
We're the biggest, the loudest, hairiest group of all

Then the bubble broke
we thought it was a joke
We could make a come back any day
We knew that we were right
the band was out of sight
The music's getting better all the time

But the crowds got smaller every place we played
And the clubs got dirtier as well
When the music stopped it was quite plain to see
The biggest, loudest, hairiest group of all

Yeah, the biggest, the loudest, hairiest group of all
Yes, the biggest, the loudest, the hairiest group of all