Santa's stressed out as the holiday season draws near He's been doing the same job now going on two thousand years He's got pains in his brain and chimney scars cover his buns He hates to admit it, but Christmas is more work than fun He needs a vacation from bad decorations and snow Mr. Claus has escape plans, a secret that only he knows Beaches and palm trees appear night and day in his dreams A break from his wife, his half-frozen life, the elves and that damn reindeer team Ho ho ho and a bottle of rum Santa's run off to the Caribbean He thinks about boat drinks and fun in the sun Ho ho ho and a bottle of rum Plastic creations and crass exploitations aren't good He wants to go back to simple toys made out of wood Just for the weekend, he'd like to be Peter Pan Get out of his long johns and dance with a sword Dance with a sword in the sand Ho ho ho and a bottle of rum Santa's run off to the Caribbean Marimbas, kalimbas, he's playing steel drums Ho ho ho and a bottle of rum Ho ho ho and a bottle of rum Santa's run off to the Caribbean Marimbas, kalimbas, he's playing steel drums Ho Ho Ho and a bottle of rum Ho ho ho and a bottle of rum Santa's run off to the Caribbean A week in the tropics and he'll be alright Sporting a tan as he rides out of sight Merry Christmas to all, and to all good night "He'll be back in a week, don't worry kiddies!" "He just needs a break. We all need a break."