Oh there's food for the homeless on the holidays
Cause no matter how filthy or uncombed
If you're down on your luck you can really graze
For the holidays we throw those bums a bone

I met a man who drank and smelled of pee he was heading for
The local mission for some homemade pumpkin pie
Panhandling folks are always hanging round by the discount liquor store
And they're not too brand specific, gee a buck would be terrific

But there's food for the homeless on the holidays
There's a turkey just like Mama made at home
If they pine for redemption from their heathen ways

Come the holidays we'll toss those bums a bone

Take a piss in your pants till you smell like you're from France
Put some vino in a crumpled paper sack
Though you're smelling like a beast
You'll be treated to a feast
Want seconds come on right back

There's lots of food for the homeless on the holidays
Have some pumpkin pie and ham with provolone
We don't care if they eat dog food on the other days
When you call a cardboard box your home sweet home
For the holidays we'll toss those bums a bone